"You have a good career, a job you enjoy doing.... You just completed your Master Degree.... Why are you quiting your career..." These were the responses I get when people learnt about my decision to "temporary" end my engineering endeavours and move to serving God.
What triggered me?
Since polytechnic days, my plan was to strive out a career, establish my own business, then retire at age 40 to serve God fulltime. That was the motivation behind the overwhelming energy and zest devoted into my work. Crazy working hours and extreme lack of sleep were common and were of no issue to me.
The pivot point took place in January 2008. Plagued by a series of health issues and relationship confusions, worsened when my two buddies were unavailabe during this period, plunged me into a state of complete helplessness. To the point that I broke down and cried like an uncontrolled running tap while driving on the highway. Who can I turn to?
Well, where else can a "deflated" Victor with no options go to, other than back to church. Perhaps, that was the only way God could reach me at that time. I had focussed not on the God of heaven and earth, but on the God of earthly riches. Everyday, work and money was on my mind.
It was only at this juncture in my life that I started to question what is life all about. Is life working 18 hours a day, earning $5K a month, $10K a month, $100K a month??? Is life really just that? I prayed for an answer, a sign, someone whom I can ask. God provides the answers to all my doubts, and in ways I could not imagine. As I pieced the encounters, I couldn't help but be amazed by it all.
Some Interesting Encounters (names not mentioned):
(ALL these took place in a span of a few months..)
(ALL these took place in a span of a few months..)
- I asked HIM what can HE do in my life?
HE provided me with some dreams that shocked me.
3 dreams i had, on different nights of 3 friends (E, E, A) -- U know who you are, friends.
I called them and found out indeed they were having issues in life.
We met up of course.
If 1 dream is coincidental, could 3 be coincidental?
And this did not stop, more "dreams" came.
I am still trying to decipher some of the dreams till this day. - At that time, the church was doing a book titled: "Book of Living Prayer". In the morning, i read on the topic of God calling us to pray through people, situations, interruptions. In the afternoon of the same day, my Godma called to say that her colleague, C, entered coma suddenly. Coincidental?
I chose to obey what I read in the morning and went down to the ICU immediately after work and found that I wasn't allowed to enter. So I called my Godma and found out that only C's husband was around. I took the bold step and asked for his handphone number. I went in, prayed for C and husband, and I never stopped going to the hospital to talk to the family, and pray for C after that. I am now part of their family.
Later, I found out that C's husband and my Godma was touched because I went the extra mile to pray for a person I had not know. C's husband has since believed and trusted in God. Through prayers, we see C's condition improved rather miraculously. Virus can be diagnosed negative a few days after tested positive, etc. C is now in normal ward, still in coma, but i know by faith, she will awake very soon. - During this period of visiting C, I also had the priviledge to pray for a young china girl, JN, in coma. She has since passed away. But we know she is in God's hand. Through the suffering of the only child, JN's parents came to know God, and became Christians. I am greatly encouraged when the father praised God during the funeral. I hugged him and cried with him. While crying, he said in mandarin: "Thank you, God. Thank you, God. I know JN is in heaven. Thank you, God". I was taken aback. Most Christians only give thanks when something "good" happens to them (if they can bother to), giving thanks in adversities, giving thanks at all times (commanded in Scriptures), was a tough act to many. Yet, JN's father, a new Christian, can give thanks at the lost of his only child. I am greatly encouraged. JN's parents have gone back to China since, but we are still in touch via letters and phonecalls. I know this is God's grace to use me to share the grieve and suffering of a fellow Christian, to be the Body of Christ. To be encouraged through this incident.
- At this time, the natural disasters in Mymmar and China struck. I questioned God. If U are so great, so real, why are such things happening? These are innocent people. Why are they killed? Why?
That day was a Thursday, where the church has the regular prayer watch. The first song we sang, shocked me. The words of the song goes somthing like this: "sometimes we do not know why things are happening this way; Often we do not even know what holds tomorrow; But we know who holds tomorrow; And we know who holds our hands" Could He be responding to my question?
The next morning, i read the daily bread and the topic was on the shepherd leading the sheep. In the day, the shepherd holds the staff high so that the sheep can see and follow. At night, the shepherd tapped the staff on the rocks / stones and the sheep follow the sound in the darkness.
That sunday, I went to the church library and wanted to get a worship CD. I fingered through the bookshelves and a book dropped into my hand, titled "Where is God when it hurts" by Phillip Yancey.
Well, I think i get the hint from HIM.
Marching forward:
There are many other amazing incidents which convicted me (many others that may just shock you) and I know I have to go serve HIM for this period of my life. Giving up what I have was tough, yet HE never fails tp provide for me when I was down, be it in spirit, or in finances.
Perhaps I will return and continue with my engineer career or, perhaps I will go lecture in a Polytechnic, or perhaps.......
I am sure God has HIS plans for me. I shall pray and leave the difficult task of providing and leading to HIM. Afterall, HE is the creator of all things.
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